The Labour Party Conference today coincides with Brighton University’s “Freshers’ Pub Crawl”. Several thousand scantily-clad and inebriated freshers have converged on Odeon Cinema adjacent to the Brighton Centre. The armed Police are looking nervous: what if they surge towards the security cordon? An ambulance has had to be called to a delegate overcome by the expanses of bare flesh heat. Ed Balls sweeps by with his entourage and looks scandalised.
Will he be talking to Lord Peter Mandelson to suggest some candidates for cuts in University funding?